Those branches had it coming! They should have known that I have been sitting (figuratively)on a well-oiled Homelite chainsaw that’s been itching to cut into something! Sure, the last time I tried to use it to cut some branches, the retaining ring and the associated washer that kept the chain in place flew off and dislodged the chain. Then I had to spend a good 2 hours brushing through the grass with a magnet in the hopes of finding these needles-in-a-haystack. In any case, I finally managed to put it all together with the help of spare parts that I found on Amazon with great difficulty.
The branches of these backyard trees had been a nuisance for a while and I had to do tricky maneuvers while mowing the lawn, in order to not get poked in the eyes.
Today was a perfect sunny day for me to take care of it. So, I managed to run the long power cord to that area and fire up the chainsaw, and was happy that it started easily (considering the trouble I had with it the last time). I quickly cut the small branches and the chainsaw was going through these like a hot knife through butter. I was just about to declare victory on one of the thicker branches, when the weight of the bending branch jammed the chain. Yikes! That’s when it occurred to me that a professional would have cut from the top and not from below, while standing under it! Duh! 🤦🏽 Now, the 10 pound chainsaw got wedged solid in the branch that was 90% cut and would not budge, no matter how much I tried to wiggle it.
After much thought and safety planning (which should have been done before I started wielding the chainsaw like a horror movie villain), I went back out with a step ladder, some twine and a steel bow saw. Once freed from the branch, I knew that the chainsaw would come crashing down to the ground or even land on me. So, I safely tied it up to another branch with the twine. Next, I positioned the ladder across from the chainsaw and cut through the remaining branch gently. After a few minutes of this, the branch gave way and the chainsaw was freed. I was very pleased that the twine held up quite well… even though it did come dangerously close to me, like a pendulum, and almost turned me Jewish! 😊
Thank god (actually Home Depot!) for giving me these powerful tools to play with, so that I can pretend to be useful around the house! Thankfully I was also bestowed with just enough wisdom to use them safely and wisely and not risk chopping any limbs off (or give myself an unintended bris! 😊)
RecoveringNostalgic 
I still remember mowing the lawn at my first house. I was a complete rookie with the lawnmower—an electric one with a long, sneaky wire that had a mind of its own. I tiptoed around like I was defusing a bomb, terrified of losing a finger or toe. In my heroic attempt to save my limbs, I ended up mowing the power cord instead. Mission aborted. Lawn: 1, Me: 0.
Before I could master the art of lawn maintenance, my wife often stepped in with expert-level instructions—as if she’d been born with a PhD in everything. Honestly, how do they know everything?
Your wife too? I thought that was just mine! 😊
I still have three 50 ft long power cords in the garage that I cut with a hedge trimmer! I am hoping to splice them up and make them usable! 😊
The lawn mower was my favorite tool to behead automatic sprinkler heads! 😊🤷🏼
I still remember mowing the lawn at my first house. I was a complete rookie with the lawnmower—an electric one with a long, sneaky wire that had a mind of its own. I tiptoed around like I was defusing a bomb, terrified of losing a finger or toe. In my heroic attempt to save my limbs, I ended up mowing the power cord instead. Mission aborted. Lawn: 1, Me: 0.
Before I could master the art of lawn maintenance, my wife often stepped in with expert-level instructions—as if she’d been born with a PhD in everything. Honestly, how do they know everything?
-Nirmaljeet
I finally handed over that department to my wife—every Sunday morning used to start with me accidentally mowing down sprinkler heads like I was on a mission. Meanwhile, she picked up the hedge trimmer and wielded it like a pro from day one—like Edward Scissorhands, but with purpose. Trying to navigate irrigation wires in our tiny yard felt more like solving a jigsaw puzzle with a blindfold. Eventually, I decided to stick to coding and provide remote tech support for the “Lawn Maintenance Department.” Once she got bored of the shiny gardening gadgets too, we made the wisest decision of all: hired a gardener and promoted ourselves to supervisory roles—aka sipping coffee and pointing fingers.
-Nirmaljeet
Joys of homeownership! 😊